10 Common Myths About Elopements (And What They’re Really Like)

Elopements have come a long way—but there are still a lot of myths floating around about what it actually means to elope. I hear these misconceptions all the time from couples who are drawn to the idea of an elopement but feel unsure because of outdated assumptions, family expectations, or what they’ve seen portrayed in movies. Understanding the elopement meaning can help clarify these misconceptions.

As an elopement photographer, I’ve worked with couples at every stage of this decision-making process. Most of the time, once couples understand what elopements really are, there’s an immediate sense of relief. So let’s clear the air.

Below are some of the most common myths about elopements—and the truth behind them.

Myth #1: Elopements Are Secret or Impulsive

This is probably the biggest misconception of all about elopements.

Eloping today is rarely a secret, and they’re almost never impulsive. In fact, most elopements are planned with just as much care and intention as traditional weddings—sometimes more.

Modern elopements are often:

• Thoughtfully planned months in advance
• Shared with family and friends before or after
• Designed around meaningful locations and experiences

Many couples choose to elope because they want to be intentional—not because they want to disappear overnight.

The truth:
Elopements are planned with clarity and purpose. They’re not about running away—they’re about choosing how you want to get married.

Myth #2: Eloping Means You Don’t Care About Family or Friends

This myth causes a lot of unnecessary guilt and sometimes hard discussions among family and friends.Choosing an elopement doesn’t mean you don’t love your family or value your community. It simply means you’re choosing a different way to experience your wedding day.

Many couples:

• Celebrate with family at a later date (very common)
• Host a dinner or party after their elopement
• Involve loved ones in meaningful ways (letters, FaceTime, sharing vows later)

Some couples even invite a small group of immediate family or close friends to their celebration.

The truth:
Elopements are about how you celebrate—not who you love.

Myth #3: Elopements Are Just the Couple and a Photographer

While some elopements are just the two of you, many elopements include:

• An officiant
• Witnesses
• Immediate family
• A small group of loved ones

Elopements can range from just the couple to 10–20 guests depending on location and permits. Once guest counts grow beyond that, the celebration often becomes a micro wedding—but the line is flexible.

The truth:
Elopements come in many forms. There’s no one-size-fits-all version.

Myth #4: Elopements Are Less Meaningful Than Weddings

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

In many cases, elopements are more emotionally rich. Some of the most intimate, emotionally charged weddings were small elopements. I have witnessed them first hand being an elopement photographer.

• There’s less pressure to perform
• The day moves at a slower pace
• Couples are more present
• The focus stays on the relationship

Without a packed timeline or large guest list, couples often feel more grounded and connected to the moment they’re committing to each other.

The truth:
Meaning isn’t determined by guest count. It’s created through intention.

Myth #5: Elopements Are Cheap or “Low Effort”

Elopements can be more affordable than traditional weddings—but they’re not “cheap,” and they’re certainly not low effort. This is one of the biggest myths about elopements.

An elopement still requires:

• Planning
• Permits (especially on public land)
• Travel coordination
• Thoughtful timelines
• Professional wedding vendors

Couples often invest in experiences instead of scale—choosing beautiful locations, meaningful details, and intentional photography rather than large venues and guest lists.

The truth:
Elopements are about reallocating your budget—not eliminating effort.

Myth #6: You Don’t Need an Elopement Photographer

This is a big one.

Some couples assume that because their elopement is small, they don’t need a dedicated elopement photographer. In reality, elopements often require more expertise than traditional weddings. Knowing the best time for lighting to have your ceremony, or finding the right location is super important. I know this first hand after living in Paris and photographing hundreds of elopements.

An experienced elopement photographer:

• Helps choose locations and timing
• Navigates permits and restrictions
• Plans timelines around light and weather
• Guides couples through unfamiliar environments
• Documents the experience without interrupting it

Elopements don’t come with built-in coordinators or venues—your photographer often becomes your guide. However, I do suggest hiring a coordinator or planner to help with the rest of your day. They may know other vendors to choose from at your desired location.

The truth:
Elopement photography is about experience, planning, and storytelling—not just photos.

Myth #7: Elopements Are Only for Adventurous Couples

You don’t need to hike miles, climb mountains, or sleep under the stars to elope. When I was living in Paris I would see couples fly to Paris to elope, just for the grandeur and beauty of the city. They weren’t looking to hike to the top of a mountain to exchange their vows. That doesn’t mean it’s not wrong or right to choose an adventure elopement. You have to find what’s right for you and your fiance.

Some elopements happen:

• In easily accessible scenic locations
• In national parks with minimal walking
• At quiet overlooks or scenic roadsides
• At private properties or boutique venues

Adventure looks different for every couple. For some, adventure is standing barefoot in the desert. For others, it’s choosing something quiet and intentional.

The truth:
Elopements are about alignment—not adrenaline.

Myth #8: Elopements Are Just a Trend

Elopements may feel more visible right now as smaller weddings are on the rise, but they’re not a passing phase. I see micro weddings and elopements becoming more common now. Couples are choosing more intentionally who they invite to their ceremony.

What’s changing isn’t the concept of eloping—it’s the permission couples feel to choose what works for them. More couples are questioning tradition, redefining success, and prioritizing meaning over expectation.

That shift isn’t going away.

The truth:
Elopements reflect a deeper cultural move toward intentional living.

Myth #9: You’ll Regret Not Having a Traditional Wedding

This is one of the biggest fears couples carry—and it’s understandable. But after photographing hundreds of elopements over the last 17 years, I have never heard anyone regret eloping. In my experience, most couples who elope don’t regret the choice itself.

What they might regret is:

• Not slowing down enough
• Not documenting it fully
• Not giving themselves permission to do it their way

Regret usually comes from pressure—not from the choice to elope.

The truth:
When an elopement is planned intentionally, regret is rare. Make it personal and uniquely special to the two of you.

Myth #10: Elopements Are Less “Real” Than Weddings

An elopement is still a wedding. You are still committing to one another and exchanging vows. You are still celebrating the unity and coming together as one in your relationship. You still sign a marriage license and change your name (sometimes). The format may be different, but the commitment is exactly the same.

The truth:
A wedding isn’t defined by its size—it’s defined by its meaning.

The Reality of Elopements

At their core, elopements are about choice.

They’re about choosing:

• Presence over pressure
• Experience over performance
• Meaning over expectation

There is no “right” way to get married—only the way that feels true to you.

If you’re drawn to eloping but held back by myths or misconceptions, know this: elopements today are thoughtful, beautiful, deeply meaningful celebrations. And when supported by the right people—especially an experienced elopement photographer—they can be one of the most powerful ways to begin your marriage.

If you’re exploring eloping and want guidance rooted in experience, clarity, and care, I’m always happy to help you think through what might feel right for you.