What Couples Wish They’d Done (or Not Done) on Their Wedding Day

I recently was listening to one of my favorite wedding industry podcasts and they were talking about couples biggest wedding regrets. It had my surprised and also curious about what else couples regret after their wedding day. After photographing countless weddings over the last 17 years, I’ve heard many couples reflect back with “If only we had…” or “We wish we hadn’t…” Here are some of the biggest wedding regrets couples have shared, and how you can plan around them.

Weddings are significant milestones in people’s lives, celebrated with family and friends. It’s crucial to take time to reflect on what truly matters to you and your partner. For many couples, the most cherished moments are often those that cannot be captured in photographs, such as heartfelt conversations with loved ones or spontaneous laughter shared between the couple. Understanding this can help prioritize what to focus on during the planning process.

1. Feeling Rushed & Not Having Enough Time

One of the top regrets: couples feeling like their day was a blur. According to a USA Today/OnePoll survey, 19% of couples said their biggest regret was the timeline or schedule — they felt rushed, didn’t get to do everything they wanted. This is a big reason why I created my own foolproof timeline that has built in buffer time. I have been using this timeline for many years and it’s been such a helpful timeline for almost every wedding I have photographed. You can find it here on my wedding planning guide.

Consider taking a moment during the reception to step away from the crowd and enjoy each other’s company. This could be a simple walk outside or a quiet moment at your table, allowing you to reflect on the joy of the day. Couples often say that these brief pauses are some of their favorite memories, helping to ground them amidst the festivities.

What you can do:

• Build buffer time in your schedule (add extra 15–30 minutes between major events).

• Prioritize what matters most to you (instead of cramming in everything).

• Work with your photographer or planner to map the “must‑have” moments (e.g., golden hour portraits, quiet time together) so they aren’t squeezed out.

2. Guest List Regrets — Either Too Big or Wrong Mix

Additionally, reviewing your guest list with a focus on relationships can help. Consider who has been there for you through significant life events and who you genuinely want to celebrate with. This might mean inviting fewer people but ensuring that those present are meaningful parts of your journey.

Many couples regret their guest list either being too large, including people out of obligation, or not inviting someone they wished they had. I recently wrote a blog post about how to choose your wedding guest list. You can read that here on the blog.

What you can do:

• Start with a “must invite” list (people you absolutely want there) and a “maybe” list.

• Think about guest experience: will you have time to talk to and enjoy your guests if there are 300 people?

• Be honest with family about your vision and your budget — sometimes clarity upfront helps avoid later regrets.

3. Skimping On Key Vendors (Especially Photography & Videography)

Regret around vendor quality is another consistent theme. For example, one review noted that nearly 24% of brides regretted not spending enough on a high‑quality photographer.

Another aspect to reflect on is how different vendors can impact your overall experience. While it’s easy to get caught up in trends and decor, remember that the quality of your photographs and video will last a lifetime. Investing in talented photographers who understand your vision can drastically elevate your memories. Consider asking for references or reviewing client testimonials to find someone who aligns with your style and expectations.

What you can do:

• Identify your top 2–3 priorities (for some couples it’s photographer, for others venue or food).

• Meet your vendor, look at full galleries (not just highlights), ask about their backup plan. I created a guide to help you choose the right photographer for you.

• Remember: you can replace décor, but you can’t redo your photos.

4. Not Having a Backup Plan (Weather, Venue, etc.)

Outdoor weddings carry their own risks. One of the regrets cited by bridal editors was “not having a rain plan” for an outdoor ceremony. Another biggest wedding regret.

When planning outdoor weddings, it can be beneficial to visit the venue at different times of day. This will give you insight into how the lighting shifts and helps you make informed decisions about placement, decor, and photography. Just as critical is having a backup plan in place, whether that means a tent rental or an alternative indoor venue. This foresight can take a significant weight off your shoulders and ensure a smoother experience on your big day.

What you can do:

• If any part of your day is outdoors, confirm a backup location or tent option.

• Understand the venue’s lighting at different times of day — especially if you care about how your photos will look.

• Pack a little kit: light jacket, umbrella, lens cloth — your photographer (and you) will thank you.

5. Focusing on Trends Instead of What’s Meaningful to You

Emphasizing your personal values over societal expectations can also lead to a more fulfilling wedding day. Share your ideas with your partner and create a vision board that reflects your dreams and aspirations for the day. This exercise can help clarify your goals and ensure that your wedding is a true reflection of your union.

According to some couples, one regret is doing things “for others” rather than choosing what they truly wanted.

What you can do:

• Ask yourselves: “If nobody knew we were having a wedding, what would we want to do?”

• Write down 2–3 things that matter most to you (connection, fun, food, time with friends). Let those guide decisions.

• It’s okay to skip something just because someone says you must have it.

6. Budget & Financial Regrets

While many couples say they don’t regret spending money, surveys show some regret certain allocations or wish they had allocated differently. For example: younger couples (Millennials, Gen Z) were more likely to feel financial regret about their wedding. This seems to be one of the biggest wedding regrets, too.

Creating a wedding budget that reflects your priorities can prevent future regrets. Think about what aspects of the wedding will truly bring you joy and invest more in those areas. For example, if food and drink are important to you, allocate a larger portion of your budget to caterers that provide high-quality options. This would contrast with opting for less impactful areas, such as extravagant centerpieces that may not hold the same long-term significance.

What you can do:

• Create a realistic budget and stick to categories you care most about.

• Consider what you’ll remember in 10 years: the décor or the time spent with people you love?

• Don’t sacrifice joy or connection chasing perfection in every detail.

Your wedding day will be beautiful no matter what. But a little planning can make it better — especially when you focus on avoiding avoidable regrets.
As someone who has spent thousands of hours photographing love stories in Utah and Seattle, I’ve seen the same patterns time and again. The couples who breathe, take a moment together, and enjoy the day with intention tend to have the images, memories, and reflections they treasure.

Keeping communication open with your partner during the planning process is essential. Regular check-ins can help ensure both of you feel represented and heard in decisions. You could also consider setting aside time each week to review your plans together, which can help mitigate stress and bring you closer as a couple.

Your wedding day will be beautiful no matter what. But a little planning can make it better — especially when you focus on avoiding avoidable regrets. As you reflect on the biggest wedding regrets shared by couples, take heart in knowing that thoughtful planning can lead to clarity and intention for your celebration. Remember, what matters most is the love you share and the connections you nurture on this special day. No matter the challenges faced, your focus on each other and your loved ones will create lasting memories that you’ll cherish forever.